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Seldom in our lifetime does the opportunity arise to actually know--or better--be known by The Possessor of one of the world's Most Fabulous Objects. But this knowledge can also prove hazardous. |
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COMFORTING STATEMENT
Because very often the mere thought of actual personal awareness of the existence of The Possessor of one of the world's Most Fabulous Objects (MFO)-- let alone genuine contact with the aforementioned Possessor--is sufficient to stimulate uncontrollable concupiscence in many, this page is intended to provide a safe, gradual exposure to prevent unpleasant, life-shattering embarrassment.
The reality is that The Possessor of this particular MFO also continues experiencing an avalanche of libidinous messages, calls, and visits. And as these deep, feral forces begin emerging in you, the reader, please understand that The Possessor is also well aware that His own personal energy alone is sufficient to elicit the aforesaid response. But He also knows the combination of this added to the the knowledge of His Possession easily far exceeds human capacities in all but the most insensate cyphers.
There is no reason for personal shame as you proceed. It might be advisable, however, to ensure all doors are securely locked and windows tightly draped.
After the relatively recent passing of renowned actor and movie star, Cesar Romero, many of his possessions were bequeathed to his brother, Eduardo, who lives in a remote, quasi-descript small town in California's Mojave Desert. Eduardo, weary of price-gouging merchants, howling winds, and ever-emerging tumbleweeds, desired (as many in that town do) to move elsewhere. To reduce the burden of relocation, he decided to have a yard sale in which he would allow some of his famous sibling's former possessions to pass into the hands of others.
The current Possessor became aware of the planned divestment and was one of the sale's first arrivals. Driven by ineffable forces, He saw The Hat and queried about its price.
Struck by the obvious divine determination that the Possessor-to-Be was intended to become The Possessor-Who-Is, Eduardo ensured fate's course remained true. Thus, The Hat passed to its new Trustee.
Almost immediately, The Possessor's phone began ringing; His answering machine was filled, His e-mail flooded; admirers pressed themselves against His manor's gate. In the interest of mercy, The Possessor decided He would produce this web page.
Description of The Hat
Verily, the Hat itself rests within The Box which is The Original Box bearing The Address handwritten on its lid. This Address is Cesar Romero's original Los Angeles residence on Saltair Avenue in the southern part of Brentwood, just west of the Veterans Administration Hospital.
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The Hat itself is white and essentially new.
(Note 1: As you may have noticed, The Hat has not yet been imaged. The reason for this is that due caution must be exercised in exposing some people to a true MFO. Because many readers lack proper impulse control, this page must continue its mission of carefully preparing them for actual exposure to The Image.)
(Note 2: A sexual liaison between The Possessor and one of His many admirers might perhaps proceed safely with, say, The Box residing in the same room. Or, more adventurously, with The Box actually partially visible. But in no case could The Hat itself be seen before or during erotic activities without appropriate and extensive pre-conditioning.)
View of the Name in the Hat
Riskily, I will now reveal the first Partial Image of The Hat. This is a picture of the name "Cesar Romero" embossed with gold-like substance inside The Hat's Headband. The Size of The Hat, as displayed by The Label, is 7 3/8.
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The Hat Actually Revealed
Now that the reader might be sufficiently prepared to bask in the virtual presence of The Hat, I, The Possessor, restate My caution about its possible impact: Strive for self-control! Restrain and medicate as necessary. The Possessor also disavows any responsibility for erotomaniacal responses when the image is, in fact, viewed.
You have been warned!
The Hat
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WARNING!! What follows might be overstimulating for many!
Of even greater hazard than the previous image, following is an actual image of The Possessor ACTUALLY WEARING The Hat!
Please convey all desperate pleas for corporeal attention to the e-mail address at the bottom of the page. The Possessor will continue making his choices based upon:
1) depth of spiritual conviction
2) relevance of gift(s) proffered
3) appearance
4) degree of sexual urgency conveyed
5) time available
Please do not telephone or, worse, join the crowds already assembled outside The Possessor's gate as the Red Cross and Salvation Army have advised that their abilities to succor the multitudes are already stretched beyond capacity.
Now, here is The Image:
The Image
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Click here for Hat Cam.